February 2012
11 posts
Want vs. Need
Life is hard and full of terrible decisions, because on the one hand I need this dress but on the other hand I want to buy groceries and pay the house payment next month.
Keep calm and paint your nails
and watch serial murderer documentaries and eat macaroni and cheese and the last of the ice cream because it’s Friday night and your husband is away and it’s a good time to dust the entertainment stand!
Wishful Thinking
Word around the office is that, when the winter weather gets bad enough, work gets cancelled! “BUT, it has to be really bad out,” people say. Despite the big BUT, I always race to my computer to skim the local news’ list of cancellations if there is even a smidge of cold morning precip outside my window. I’m 11 again.
Something I never thought I would say: Panera...
It depresses me.
If you're speculating about the vitamins I own,...
You should quit gossiping, judging and jumping to conclusions and live your life. And if you don’t mind, click here to read all about the letter P.
1 tag
Contracts
Me: This contract isn't signed. I need a signed contract or this customer's getting pulled.
Rep: Well. Huff! Noo. Can't I just sign it FOR THEM?
Me: Of course not. What? How is that legal?
Rep: Well can't you just use their signature from one of their old contracts?
Me: Absolutely no. I need a new signature.
Rep: There IS a new signature.
Me: No there's not. We're not negotiating this.
Rep: [Faxes me a hastily signed piece of random paper with the words "I approve my contract" scribbled in pen]
Me: Ok. What? Are you serious with this? You just wrote that yourself.
On Slurping
Parents, teach your children the social perils of slurping, please.
Cory turning me into a morning person is about as...
This is my cowardly way of telling my family and...
Menstrual cramps to the layperson. *Love you Web MD.
1 tag
Fishing For Compliments Fail
Cory: I love morning storms.
Me: Me too honey. What else do you love?
Cory: Wakeboarding.
Me: ...ohh.